Ryan Taylor

Ryan Taylor

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Two guys in the Commons sketch

Two guys in the Commons

By: Ryan Taylor

Person #1: Hey look at that girl did you see the rack on her?

(Person #2 talks and turns to the side to Person #1)

Person: #2: Yeah man I saw her she had some big boobs and her butt was looking really good. Look at this one she is really shaking her money maker all down the commons. God I think she is a ten at least.

(Now back to Person #1)

Person #1: Yeah man she is looking good in the face too and her body is banging. Hey baby!! Hey Baby!! how about you and me in my bed.

(Person #2 talking to another girl)

Person #2: Hey baby I can see yourself in my pants. Come over here and sit on daddy's lap,and I'll show you a magic trick.

(Now back to Person #1)

Person #1: Hey good lookin' watcha got cookin'. I like to have some of that you are having.

(Person #2 talking)

Person#2: Man all of these here at this school are really hot and banging. I mean we are in heaven with all of these girls.

(Person #1 ending the sketch)

Person #1: Well I think our work here is done let's go to Wendy's or something and get a bite to eat and harass the hotties there.

(Person #2 talking)

Person#2: That sounds like a plan or better yet we can slap there asses while we are there too.

(Person #1 looks at him devious way)

Person #1: Yeah that would be really nice and cool at the same time.

( Both of them looking,talking and walking while looking at this girl)

Person#1: Wow this girl right here is a number 20 if there was such a scale on the hottie meter. Damn! that girl is rocking. I like to show her a trick or two.

( Person# 2: while walking)

Person# 2: Yeah she all I want to do get in her pants man.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Skit ideas

1. Jesus v. Mohammda ( UFC)
2. Steroids parody
3. Debating goes wrong
4. Shooting a homeless guy
5. Mafia being president
6. More weekend update pieces
7. How to talk to people Kayla style
8. A black, Jew, Mexican, and an englishmen yelling at the tv.
9. Name that douchebag
10. Potlical pieces.
11. Foreigner filling out a police report
12. Doctor who didn't go to college

Thursday, March 25, 2010

funny one liner

silly Republicans tricks r for kids

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

name the d-bag skit in the works

Name that d-bag
By: Ryan Taylor

Game show host: Welcome to another installment of name that D-bag the rules are simple name a famous person or some in this school correctly and you automatically get ten points. Look at that lovely group of people what are your names?
Contestant # 1: My name is Mike Hunt and I like in Jacksonville, Florida.
Game show host: That is lovely and what is your name pretty girl?
Contestant #2: My name is Jessica and I live in New York, New York.
Game show host: What is your name and you look like a D-bag.
Contestant 3#: My name is Matt Finely and I live in Rockport, Indiana and I have a kid on the way.
Game show host: Alright Let’s plays name that D-bag. Here’s your first question he is the star of the new movie Milk? Name that d-bag.
Constant #2: How is Sean Penn.!
Game show host: That is correct! Next question he goes to South Spencer and he looks like a caveman?
Constant # 1: How is Mac Webb?
Game show host: How is the magician who stars on the A&E show Kris Angle mind freak?
Constant # 3: Who is Kris Angle?!
Game show host: That’s correct! Next question what rapper was married to Brittney Spears and has own Rap album?
Constant #3: Who is Kevin Federline?
Game show host: That is correct!!

Friday, March 12, 2010

steroids, the breakfast of champions

Are u tired of the same old cereal;it doesn't give u enough pep in your step. here's a new cereal for u called Steroids. The wholesome goodness of steroids and the fruity flavors will surely give a pep in your step. It will give u muscles and an attitude they will be positive and alarming. It make u angry and u what to beat on people and throw things at them. It will make your Cadillac into a Beetle bug. The cereal also comes in liquid with an injection needle. Steroids, the breakfast of Champions!!!